Come, follow me. Prevention S5
PREVENTION SKILL: Healthy Thinking
Mindful Minutes “Square Breathing” Activity.
Use anytime you need to reduce stress, manage anxiety, improve focus, promote relaxation, such as before important events, or as part of your daily routine. Helps calm the nervous system by regulating your breath and lowering your heart rate.
Step 1: Sit comfortably and close your eyes. Slowly inhale through your nose while counting to four. Imagine drawing the first side of a square as you breathe in.
Step 2: Hold your breath for a count of four. Visualize drawing the second side of the square during this pause.
Step 3: Slowly exhale through your mouth while counting to four. Picture drawing the third side of the square as you breathe out.
Step 4: Hold your breath again for a count of four. Complete the square by imagining drawing the fourth side during this pause.
Step 5: Repeat Steps 1 through 4 for two minutes.
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GROUP SHARING Section – Maximum time 20 minutes
Let's check in and reflect on your week. This is a safe, supportive space where we can encourage one another and focus on positive steps forward. This is a time for connection, learning, and support—let’s lift each other up! You’re invited to share for 3 to 5 minutes about anything you’ve been working on:
· Challenges you faced and how you handled them.
· Your experiences practicing CRAFTConnect principles and skills.
· How your Family Chat went and what you learned.
· Ways you took care of yourself and practiced self-compassion.
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LEARN SECTION – Maximum time 30 minutes
1. Jesus taught that what’s inside your heart affects your whole life. In Luke 6:45, He said, “A good person brings good things out of the good stored up in their heart… For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.” This means your thoughts and feelings on the inside shape what you say and do on the outside. If you think something is terrible, you might feel sad or angry. If you think something is okay, you may feel calm
2. Sometimes, you have thoughts that are not true or fair. These are called thinking errors. They are inaccurate thoughts that hurt how you see yourself and others. Everyone has these kinds of thoughts, including your children. When you think this way a lot, it can harm your emotional and spiritual health.
3. Jesus taught to be slow to judge others and ourselves. In Matthew 7:1-2, He said, “Do not judge, or you too will be judged.” Thinking errors are often a kind of judgment—about ourselves or others—that may not be true. For example, you’re stuck with a flat tire on the side of a freeway ramp. It’s scary, and you really hope someone will help. Suddenly, you see a close friend or family member driving past. They see you—but instead of stopping, they speed up and keep going. You call them, but they don’t answer.
How would you feel? __________________________________________________
Later, you find out they were rushing an injured child to the hospital. You couldn’t see the child from where you were.
Now how do you feel? _________________________________________________
4. This shows how quick judgments can be wrong. Your first thought wasn’t accurate because you didn’t know the whole story. John 7:24 says, “Stop judging by mere appearances, but instead judge correctly.” Philippians 4:8 reminds us: “Whatever is true, whatever is noble... think about such things.”
5. Here are some common thinking errors:
· All or Nothing: Everything is either terrible or perfect.
· Mislabeling: Judging yourself or others harshly after one mistake.
· Jumping to Conclusions: Deciding what someone else is thinking without proof.
· Microscope Thinking: Focusing too much on one small problem.
· Personalizing: Blaming yourself for things that aren’t your fault.
· Emotional Reasoning: Believing something is true just because you feel strongly about it.
· Carnival Thinking: Guessing what others think or what will happen without facts.
· Should Statements: Telling yourself or others what “should” happen and feeling bad when it doesn’t.
Talk About It: What thinking errors do you or your children get stuck in? How do they affect your home and family?
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Identify Thinking Errors Activity
The first step in overcoming thinking errors is to honestly and objectively identify when you may be using them.
Step 1: Read the following Situation/Thought examples and circle the inaccurate thinking patterns that may apply.
Step 2: Now think of a real-life situation/though where you may have used a thinking error and write that down. (You will use the same situation in the two activities that follow.)
Step 3: Circle the inaccurate thinking patterns that may apply to your own situation/thought.
Example 1 Situation/Thought
“I saw the way Mary Jones looked at me when my kids were noisy at the school meeting. She thinks I am a bad parent, and the rest of the PTA probably feels the same.”
Example 1 Inaccurate Thinking Patterns
All or Nothing
Mislabeling
Jumping to Conclusions
Microscope Thinking
Personalizing
Emotional Reasoning
Carnival Thinking.
Should Statements
Example 2 Situation/Thought
“I saw several people drifting off during my presentation at school/work. I am sure everyone found it boring.”
Example 2 Inaccurate Thinking Patterns
All or Nothing
Mislabeling
Jumping to Conclusions
Microscope Thinking
Personalizing
Emotional Reasoning
Carnival Thinking.
Should Statements
Your Real-Life Situation/Thought
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Your Real-Life Situation/Thought Inaccurate Thinking Patterns
All or Nothing
Mislabeling
Jumping to Conclusions
Microscope Thinking
Personalizing
Emotional Reasoning
Carnival Thinking
Should Statements
Talk About It: Share your real-life situation and thinking errors with the group.
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6. The second step in overcoming your thinking errors is to challenge them. To challenge something is to confront, question, or dispute an idea. Below is a list of challenge questions you can use to evaluate thinking errors you may be using.
· Is this thought true and accurate? What evidence is there to show that my understanding of this situation may not be accurate?
· If my perception is really true, does it make me a “bad” person? Does it make those involved “bad” people?
· What would I tell my best friend if they had these kinds of thoughts?
· Is thinking this way helpful to me or is it just distressing me?
· What would be so bad if my thought proved to be accurate? Would it be a catastrophe or the end of the world?
Challenge Thinking Errors Activity
Step 1: Using the Situation/Thought examples from the last activity, write your own challenge questions that could help you change inaccurate thinking patterns. Use the same Real-Life Situation/Thought you wrote in the first activity.
Example 1 Situation/Thought
“I saw the way Mary Jones looked at me when my kids were noisy at the school meeting. She thinks I am a bad parent, and the rest of the PTA probably feels the same.”
Example 1 Thinking Error Challenge Questions
“Am I really a bad parent?”
“Does the fact that I feel this way make it true?”
“Are all parents with noisy kids’ bad parents too?
Example 2 Situation/Thought
“I saw several people drifting off during my presentation at school/work. I am sure everyone found it boring.”
Example 1 Thinking Error Challenge Questions
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Your Real-Life Situation/Thought
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Your Real-Life Situation/Thought Thinking Error Challenge Questions
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Talk About It: How did the challenge questions help you gain a new perspective on the situation and your thoughts or impressions?
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7. After you have identified and challenged your thinking errors, the third step is to replace them with more accurate statements. Using the same examples, including your own real-life situation/thought, from the last two activities apply some challenges questions to the thinking errors and come up with more accurate statement about these situation/thoughts.
More Accurate Thoughts Activity
Example 1 Situation/Thought
“I saw the way Mary Jones looked at me when my kids were noisy at the school meeting. She thinks I am a bad parent, and the rest of the PTA probably feels the same.”
Example 1 More Accurate Thoughts
“Mary’s kids are also noisy, and she is not a bad parent.
“I’m trying my best and so is she.”
“Even if Mary thinks that, it’s not the end of the world.”
Example 2 Situation/Thought
“I saw several people drifting off during my presentation at work. I am sure everyone found it boring.”
Example 2 More Accurate Thoughts
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Your Real-Life Situation/Thought
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Your Real-Life Situation/Thought More Accurate Thoughts
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Talk About It: What are some of the challenges you may face as you try to become more accurate in your thinking? What gets in the way?
8. Jesus taught us to keep trying and to build our lives on a solid foundation. In Matthew 7:24, He said, “Everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock.” Changing how we think takes practice. Each time you notice a thinking error, stop, challenge it, and replace it. Over time, your thoughts will become more peaceful and more accurate. And that will bless your emotional and spiritual life—and your family’s.
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MY COMMITMENTS Section
9. These are the group commitments, we will start the next CRAFT Connect session by reporting on our commitments. This week I will:
A. Hold the “Family Chat: “Brainiac Moves” or alternative “The Giant Bear” Family Chat for younger children.
B. Do the in-between session assignments:
· Use the “Thought Management Help Worksheet” to identify, challenge, replace, and practice thought management for two situations.
C. Show kindness to myself by having self-compassion and taking care of myself.
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FAMILY CHAT FOR OLDER CHILDREN: Brainiac Moves
Mindful Minutes “Square Breathing” Activity.
Use anytime you need to reduce stress, manage anxiety, improve focus, promote relaxation, such as before important events, or as part of your daily routine. Helps calm the nervous system by regulating your breath and lowering your heart rate.
Step 1: Sit comfortably and close your eyes. Slowly inhale through your nose while counting to four. Imagine drawing the first side of a square as you breathe in.
Step 2: Hold your breath for a count of four. Visualize drawing the second side of the square during this pause.
Step 3: Slowly exhale through your mouth while counting to four. Picture drawing the third side of the square as you breathe out.
Step 4: Hold your breath again for a count of four. Complete the square by imagining drawing the fourth side during this pause.
Step 5: Repeat Steps 1 through 4 for two minutes.
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Read: Today we’re going to talk about thinking errors or why we sometimes make mistakes in our thoughts, like jumping to conclusions or being too negative about a situation/thought. By recognizing these errors, we can think more clearly, make better choices, and feel happier! Let’s get started with a story.
The Johnson family saw everything in one of two ways -- either it was the best thing ever or the worst thing ever. One day, Dad decided to bake cookies. “These will be either the best cookies in the whole universe or a total disaster!” he said excitedly. As the cookies baked, Mom looked at the timer. “If the cookies burn, it will ruin our whole week!” she worried. While the cookies were baking, their daughter Lily was practicing her school presentation in front of the bedroom room. “If I don’t get an A+, I’ll be the biggest loser in school!” she cried. When the cookies were done, they were a little too brown. “Oh no! We’ve made the worst cookies ever!” Dad exclaimed, pretending to faint. “We’ll be banned from watching cooking shows forever!” said Mom. As Lily finished practicing, she slumped onto her bed, “If I don’t do great, I might as well drop out of school!” Finally, little Timmy who had been waiting patiently for a cookie said, “I’m going outside to play.” “Playing is a waste of time unless you’re going to win a prize!” Mom and Dad shouted together. And so, the Johnsons lived in a world where every day was either a big win or a huge failure.
Talk About It: What did you learn from that story? (Chose three discussion questions to encourage children to reflect on and apply the story’s lessons to their own experience.)
· As you look at the “Thinking Errors Handout” which one did the Johnson family fall into?
· How do you think the Johnson’s feels because they only see things as really good or really bad?
· Can you remember a time when you thought something was either a big success or a total failure? How did that make you feel?
· What do you think would happen if the Johnsons tried to see things in a more balanced way instead of only extremes?
· How was Timmy’s view about playing outside different from his family’s? What can we learn from him?
· What are some good ways to feel better when things don’t go the way we wanted?
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ACTIVITY
Preparation: Print out and post the “Thinking Errors Handout”, refer to it during this activity.
Instruction: Have the group sit in a circle. Start with one player sharing a small challenge they faced recently (Example, “I didn’t do well on a quiz”). The next player responds by adding a positive spin or an upside to that challenge (Example, “And now you know what to study for next time.”). Continue around the circle until everyone has had a turn to share a positive response to the first player’s challenge. When that cycle is complete a new player shares their challenge and then each member of the circle shares a positive response to that challenge. After every player has had a turn sharing their own challenge and getting group members responses discuss how acknowledging challenges while also recognizing positives can help balance the “All or Nothing” thinking of the Johnson family.
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Read: When we are able to understand different points of view, we are able to achieve a balance that leads to happier life. Let’s encourage each other to be careful when making judgments, and try to make sure our judgments are accurate. This week lets be more aware of our inaccurate thoughts and try to make our thoughts more accurate.
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FAMILY CHAT FOR YOUNGER CHILDREN: The Giant Bear with “Winnie-the-Pooh”
Read: Today, we're going to talk about mistakes we make in our thinking. Sometimes, we jump to conclusions or think too negatively about things. Let's begin with a story inspired by A. A. Milne’s Winnie-the-Pooh characters.
Once upon a time in the Hundred Acre Wood, Winnie the Pooh found a big, muddy footprint while he was walking. He wondered, “Who could have made such a large print?” His imagination went wild. “What if it’s a giant bear?” Pooh thought. Excited and a little scared, he ran to tell his friends. First, he went to Rabbit’s house. “Rabbit! There’s a huge bear in the woods! We need to get ready!” Rabbit, who was busy planting carrots, looked confused. “Pooh, maybe you should find out more before we panic.” But Pooh was already on his way to find Piglet, who was picking flowers. “Piglet! We have to hide! A giant bear is coming!” Piglet looked worried. “Oh no, Pooh! What should we do?” “Let’s ask Eeyore,” Pooh suggested, thinking he might have a good idea. When they reached Eeyore’s home, Pooh told him about the footprint. Eeyore just sighed and said, “Maybe it’s just a muddy boot. You should check first.” Feeling a little silly, Pooh decided to look closer. They followed the footprints and discovered Tigger, who had been jumping around and landed in a puddle! Pooh laughed. “It’s just Tigger!” The friends giggled and realized that jumping to conclusions can lead to unnecessary worry. From that day on, they promised to find out the truth before getting scared, enjoying many more fun adventures together in the sunny Hundred Acre Wood.
Talk About It: What did you learn from that story? (Chose three discussion questions to encourage children to reflect on and apply the story’s lessons to their own experience.)
· What did Pooh think when he saw the big muddy footprint? Why do you think he jumped to that conclusion?
· How did Rabbit and Eeyore react when Pooh told them about the giant bear? What does this show us about how they solve problems?
· Can you remember a time when you jumped to a conclusion about something? What happened, and how did you feel when you found out the truth?
· Why is it important to get all the facts before we make a decision or get worried? How can we do this in our own lives?
· How did Pooh and his friends feel when they found out it was just Tigger? What lesson do you think they learned from this?
· What are some ways we can help ourselves remember to think carefully and not jump to conclusions when we aren’t sure about something?
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ACTIVITY
During the activity, players will learn the importance of gathering information before jumping to conclusions.
Preparation: Print out and post the “Common Thinking Errors Handout”, refer to it during the activity. Fill a bag you cannot see through with assorted small common objects like a spoon, toy, ball, piece of fruit, etc.
Instructions: Each players gets 1 minute to silently guess what’s inside without looking, only by feeling the outside of the bag. Encourage them to think questions about the weight and texture of the bag. After every player has had their minute, each shares their guesses. The bag is opened and the objects revealed. Players share their feelings during the guessing process and how jumping to conclusions can lead to mistakes.
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Read: Taking time to gather facts before making judgments to help prevent misunderstandings in real-life situations. Like Rabbit did with Pooh let’s encourage each other to be careful when making judgments, and try to make sure our judgments are accurate. This week lets be more aware of our inaccurate thoughts and try to make our thoughts more accurate.
Let’s repeat together the Winnie-the-Pooh cheer -- “Always remember, you’re braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, smarter than you think, and more loved than you know.”
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THOUGHT MANAGEMENT HELP WORKSHEET
Situation/Thought #1. Describe the situation and what your initial thoughts were
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Inaccurate Thinking Pattern. What type of thinking errors did you use in the situation?
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More Accurate Thoughts. Challenging your initial thoughts write down more rational, accurate responses
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Situation/Thought #2. Describe the situation and what your initial thoughts were
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Inaccurate Thinking Pattern. What type of thinking errors did you use in the situation?
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More Accurate Thoughts. Challenging your initial thoughts write down more rational, accurate responses
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Situation/Thought #3. Describe the situation and what your initial thoughts were
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Inaccurate Thinking Pattern. What type of thinking errors did you use in the situation?
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More Accurate Thoughts. Challenging your initial thoughts write down more rational, accurate responses
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COMMON THINKING ERRORS HANDOUT
Sometimes we make mistakes in how we think that can make us believe the worst things about any situation. They can also make us feel sad about ourselves and others. Sometimes, we get stuck in these kinds of common thinking errors and don’t realize how they can hurt our feelings.
All or Nothing
Inaccurate Thought: "If I don’t get a 100% on my homework, I’m a total failure."
More Accurate Thought: "If I don’t get a 100%, it doesn’t mean I did a bad job; I can still learn and try again."
Mislabeling
Inaccurate Thought: "I didn’t do well on one quiz; I’m a terrible student."
More Accurate Thought: "I didn’t do my best on that quiz, but I’ve done well on others and can improve next time.
Jumping to Conclusions
Inaccurate Thought: "My friend didn’t play with me at recess; she must not like me anymore."
More Accurate Thought: "Maybe my friend had something else on her mind; and didn’t feel like playing today.”
Microscope Thinking
Inaccurate Thought: "I spilled juice on the table and ruined the party."
More Accurate Thought: "I spilled juice, but we can clean it up and still have fun at the party."
Personalizing
Inaccurate Thought: "My brother is grumpy; it must be because of something I did."
More Accurate Thought: "My brother might just be having a bad day, that doesn’t have anything to do with me."
Emotional Reasoning
Inaccurate Thought: "I feel scared about trying out for the team; that means I won’t make it."
More Accurate Thought: "Feeling scared is normal, but it doesn’t mean I can’t do my best in tryouts."
Carnival Thinking
Inaccurate Thought: "If I ask to join the game, they’ll probably say no."
More Accurate Thought: "I won’t know what will happen unless I ask; they might be happy to let me join."
Should Statements
Inaccurate Thought: "I should always get along with everyone."
More Accurate Thought: "Sometimes it’s okay not to get along with everyone; I can still be kind and respectful."